a nasty thought expressed

lol ... so the connection went from loving desire and longing ... to a blocking due to who knows what ... lol -- gee, i wonder ... and I wonder why that it? but my biggest thing here is getting the connection finally severed or fulfilled ... I'm open to either at this point ... this guy has an ass that begs to be fucked ... but of course, the heart may want what it wants, but the ass is getting what it needs-- lol as is the dick ... and in the end the ass and the cock wins ... but well, it was my fault really for not being the replacement for the other cock when i had the chance to ... but who knows ... my mate is yet to come and my cock may yet get buried in that ass ... but seriously, i want to find love and not be "the man I chose in lieu of ... because that one didn't satisfy my emotional needs" ... but really, do bottoms have emotional needs ... I am begining to wonder ... slap them up, piss on them, rape their hole and they are as happy as a clam ... lol ... well, it's a game, as I was telling an interlocutor ... we all have a fantasy in our head and it's a matter of finding the person who compliments our fantasy ...

so i want a sub bottom i can also be loving and/or nasty with but who won't see my romantic side as a weakness ... Jesus, why is that so hard to find?
like right now i would love to have a bottom here nursing on my hard cock while i slap his face, have him drink my piss or piss on his face, then turn him around and ram my cock up his ass ... and once done, cuddle and kiss him and love him and pet him ... so simple, really ... lol

meanwhile I'm heading to my weekly meditation with a hard cock in my pants ...

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