LookerQ LookerQG

let's start with the easy ones, ok? if you're femme and a bottom with a bubble butt, you got it made, for the most part. In the dating game there are many a butch guy who likes his bottom femme--and you will be easy to identify. If you're a femme top, well, good luck. Apparently no bottom wants to be mounted by a feminine man--with the few exceptions--so you have to sift through the piles. If you're a butch, smack'em top-well, another easy one... bottoms a plenty for you--unless you have a small cock... and then your choices dwindle ... Same goes for the "straight on the DL" bunch -- you'll have plenty of use'em and dump'em bottoms lined up for the chance ... If you're naturally masculine and a top and hung, again, easy as pie ... bottoms a plenty ... unless you're a sensitive guy or are looking for romance ... then your choices dwindle a bit ... bottoms seem to want the "manly asshole top"--and by manly-man we mean sex...

- my health -- I thank the powers that have improved my health and strengthened my stomach family - and their ongoing support - the Spiritist Group of NY -- the weekly sessions are making a challenging period of my life much more manageable ... the spiritual benefactors help dissipate negative or destructive thoughts and help me keep my connection to the light of the higher self - A friend whose presence is still a source of strength - my friends who keep me in mind at all times - for a life challenge that has made me realize so much about myself; and has helped me see and appreciate my true friends - for a terrible mistake that has made me appreciate the worth of so many things.

These days I make fun of myself ... sometimes I even mock the innocence with which I face things. For example, a couple of weeks ago I decided to dedicate myself to make radical changes in my life ... to rid myself of so many things that so far have been overwhelming me ... so many things that are part of past yet I was carrying them along ... I had already been shedding several of those things... even more so those that were burdening me for years ... so much time has passed since those events, and I was still carrying them along so neatly packed, that they were almost part of me; and I had to work intensely even to just identify them - and make a much bigger effort to get rid of them ... or at least distance myself from them enough to diminish their toxicity and see them or what they were. I also wanted to release some feelings that I had assumed I'd eradicated completely, sublimated them beyond the conscious and the subconscious ... but I realized that my efforts were to no ...

Easy things become difficult when we put a price on them furtive looks are much more economic that direct eye contact and much more cheaper are words that hide it all and let's not talk about the price of a touch -- outrageously expensive! it is cheaper to casually brush a shoulder or a hand than to pay the high price of an embrace. and in the end how much have we saved? Do we now have enough to buy loneliness ...?

i love want desire i crave long hunger i wish dream fantasize i play laugh enjoy i think hope project i ... and you?

Practicing the Presence through Mind and Meditation It's time to put aside the traditional concepts of relationship and seriously consider the notion of a cosmic, spiritual partnership that will transcend those of the past. Not only is this new concept beginning to take hold and flourish, in the end it is going to prevail. And it's going to prevail because ego will have no place in such a union. Spiritual partnership is based upon equality, balance between the male and female energies, the freedom and the strength to be one's self while taking responsibility for one's actions, sacred sexuality, open and truthful communication without fear of ridicule, honoring and respecting the other's strengths and weaknesses, and the genuine recognition that your partner is truly your most intimate and all-embracing friend. - the wisdom of Michael Massaro

were that i will - that I will have said that which i've been holding and not with so many words--i know how to say were that i will have given in to have reached out to touch this and that of you beyond were that i will have reached out and touched your heart {my favorite part of you and then your lipseyes} were that i will have to empty my heart's void and i'm lost in the need to

"negative times positive = negative" -- math axiom so i recently went to a talk about spiritual growth and a very interesting idea was put forth ... negative spirits (in body or disembodied) that feed off the energy of others ... in other words, parasitical spirits. parasitical spirits, because of they are in a lower stage of spiritual evolution, feed off the spiritual energy of more evolved spirits. These parasites usually select spirits weakened by emotional of physical problems. The victims are usually spirits that have very low level of self love/low self esteem. The parasite usually takes the form of a loved or trusted one: a family member, a close friend, a lover ... they usually create a dependency, emotional, physical, sexual with their victim ... once the dependency is created, they will drain the energy of the victim. The victim will become physically and emotionally ill -- sleeplessness, depression, neurological or immunological issues develop -- all the while, t...

Many, many things they bring to mind- cherry-blossoms. -Matsuo Basho Break, break against the trees, give them life. Let them shed forgetfulness and remembrance, Blow, blow patient and weave wandering clouds with your creative scent. Fly, fly away. Abandon the steps of a setting sun and rise, blooming, to new horizons. Forget, forget and part. Let the stars guide you and I'll grant you my dreams.

Ah yes, they are the Gods of New York the pretty fags in Louis Vuitton on beautiful sunny days they walk their wardrobe instead of their dogs and late at night their fashionable knees buff the floors of the trendiest pubs Oh yes, the marvelous boys -- enviable martyrs of the homosexual cause!

the psycho-sexual dependent relationship so recently have met a couple of very interesting guys--both who were sub bottom. one in particular was of interest. he wanted to have a relationship based on domination. his interest was on having a masculine guy dominate him in and out of bed. this domination would include his submission in bed, being physically punished {slapped} if he misbehaved or didn't do as told; getting discretely slapped in public, having his holes used in any way--even by force, cleaning and doing chores, etc ... his exact words were, "I want an old fashion relationship where the man has full control over his mate" ... I find this fascinating. I can always see this as part of sex play, but I can't see it translated into everyday situations. I could not see myself controlled by anyone or having them slap me and find that hot ... granted, I do find slapping a sub-bottom arousing--but like I said, all in the confines of sex play. I remember my class...

Sometimes I feel disjointed                          Like I want to go away Far away         And just Not Sometimes I feel                                Like there was A turn I missed       The road diverged or converged And I ... Sometimes I Feel Like I feel Today I feel like It's not the right day and                        My brain just won't and     My          Heart just Won't And there's no turning Sometimes I Feel t oo Mu ch A n d I Ca n't Can n't

“Don’t grieve. Anything you lose comes round in another form.” ― Rumi “You never know what you have till you've lost it.” ― Alyson Noel, Evermore  “You don't know who is important to you until you actually lose them.” ― Mahatma Gandhi

When we least expect it, life throws a challenge before us that tests our courage and willingness to change.

"Forgiveness is self defense." interesting quote recently said at a conference I attended recently. And the idea basically is that we should forgive those who have wronged or hurt us, whether intentionally or not; in the end the anger and resentment we harbor will ultimately hurt/damage our spirit. But the first step in forgiveness is forgiving ourselves--we need to forgive and love ourselves unconditionally to be able to extend our love to others.

want fantasy desire longing facts words indecision end beginnings understanding falling waking moving

I used to think I liked the work "Joy" ... it's really a beautiful word full of happiness and a sense of freedom ... when hand written it seems so perfect .. and then there is love ... but it's such a tired word ... it has almost lost its luster ... everyone is always using the word for everything ... I love my car, I love my cat, I love my shoes, I love my cock ... love love love ... really!? but now I realize I like the word "harmony" ... if someone were to ask me to pick the perfect word, that would be the one: Harmony ... seven letters that have a harmony all their own ... but yes, it's the perfect word--it encompasses so much ... in it dwell love and joy and unity and freedom and peace and sympathy and tenderness and much more ... all in one word ... even the sound is perfect

what is this feeling really? some sort of chemical reaction ... just blurs all reason and logic. the brain keeps releasing this or that hormone or chemical ... I don't really know what it's called and too lazy now to look it up ... anyways, it just keeps releasing it and we feel something--like a longing mixed with desire and deep affection .... and the heart races and the cock gets hard and the brain creates all these beautiful fantasies ... pornographic and sometimes heroic ... like sometimes there is this fantasy that I bump into this  guy and I talk to/seduce him and push him against some wall somewhere in the west village and french kiss him  ... fantasies that take a life of their own and I have to shut them off ... because they have a tendency to happen at the most inconvenient times ... or I'm standing somewhere innocently going about my business and he pops into my head and I get a fucking mean hard-on and it's like what the fuck!! jeez but I digress ... what ...

body, mind, heart, and spirit move in different spheres of time. at one time I envisioned they moved synchronously; and, for example, feelings translated to understanding (or vice versa) and the  body would adjust or react accordingly ... seems logical that this is how things should work--but it isn't: body, mind, heart, and spirit revolve in their own orbits, tied only what one calls intuition. it's our intuition that connects the four ... and it's always a hard balance. intuition is often ignored. we prefer to trust reason and logic. after all, for centuries now we have been trained to think using deductive reasoning or some version of the scientific method .... reason, reason, reason ... facts and logic prevail ... but how does that translate to how we manage feelings and deal with people, particularly people we love? it doesn't really. the formula here has to change, or we just throw formulas ut the window and let out intuition guide us. it can be a scary thing. som...

Every man creates his executioner: real or imagined, perceived or physical, the executioner thrives, flourishes grows and matures fed by this or that fear, fear of this that or the other some carry their executioner with pride--just as one would a Coat of Arms others hide it with shame, they disguise it behind kindness or disdain for others yet, it is their raison d'être and there are those who live in it as a bird in its nest--protected by their pain they live comfortably in their unhappiness. one is not born with the executioner, but many die because of him, or worse yet many live drowning in their living tomb allowing the routine of unfulfilling comfort mark set existence-- disatisfied, they find comfort in momentary pleasures, in fleeting gestures of acknowledgement and the executioner grows, grows, grows until he becomes the unyielding monster that keeps us stuck until we settle but what has now become comfortable ... and the body grieves,...

El verdugo Cada hombre ve de cara a su verdugo: Real, imaginario, físico, percibido,   el verdugo se desarrolla, florece Crece y madura nutrido por este o aquel temor, miedo a esto, aquello o a lo demás Algunos cargan su verdugo con orgullo—como un escudo de honor Otros lo esconden con vergüenza, lo disfrazan tras desdén o bondad Para otros aún es la razón de su existencia, su “el por qué de mi vida” Y están aquellos que viven en el como ave en su nido—protegidos por su dolor Felices en su infelicidad. Con el verdugo no se nace, pero por él muchos mueren, o peor, no viven. Ahogándose en su tumba en vida, Dejan que la rutina de la incómoda comodidad marque su existencia Insatisfechos, se satisfacen con este o aquel momentáneo placer, este o aquel gesto de “te veo” Y el verdugo crece, crece, crece hasta ser el enorme monstruo que los mantiene en su prisión Y el cuerpo en duelo, y aún más el corazón.  “¿y dónde cabe el amor en todo est...

All truth passes through three stages. First, it is ridiculed. Second, it is violently opposed. Third, it is accepted as being self-evident. -Arthur Schopenhauer The great enemy of the truth is very often not the lie, deliberate, contrived and dishonest, but the myth, persistent, persuasive and unrealistic. -John F. Kennedy  If you are out to describe the truth, leave elegance to the tailor. -Albert Einstein

To be alone is choice. To be lonely is a condition {a logical equation of cause and effect}.

The harmony which regulates the mechanism of the universe can only result from combinations adopted in view of predetermined ends, and thus, by its very nature, reveals the existence of an Intelligent Power. To attribute the first formation of things to chance is nonesense for chance cannot produce the results of intelligence. If chance could be intelligent, it would cease to be chance. Allan Kardec

Ace of Pentacles Hi G***. The Pentacles are connected to the zodiac earth signs of Taurus, Virgo and Capricorn. Earth signs are dependable, practical, structured, and grounded. Earth signs need to feel grounded, and they will work hard until they feel they have succeeded in finding their perfect comfort zone. They are very dependable but need emotional security like the Water signs, but crave stability. Earth signs are realistic and will rise in their careers because they are dedicated and focused, but also very focused on their long term goals to feel solid. Earth signs come across a being cool and distant, but they are shy and cautious.The Ace of Pentacles represents the seed that is ready to bloom which expresses’ your creativity and desire to start something new. This is the time when you feel ready to launch a new beginning, and the energy inside of you will burn hot, propelling you in a new direction to accomplish your dream. The Ace of Pentacles is the beginning stage...

heart and mind have their own language, their own rules ... logic can't interfere, can't control, can't fathom ... it can only watch and wonder as the body feels this or that sensation ... as the mind wills its own web ... and we are helpless before it ... we can know this or that and we can reason that this is a result of this or that, but the heart has rules it must obey ... and we can bend our will to do and say and build or destroy and think we're are in control of it all  ... and the heart watches, just like a magnanimous god would its helpless creatures.

  "In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God." ~John 1:1 Did you know that writing helps give clarity to your thoughts? It's even said that it is more effective to write about what your feeling that to talk about it since it will help channel your mood. The written word has a powerful effect ... words in general have a powerful effect ...  they can help create and destroy, purge, cleanse, purify ... sometimes we carry negative emotions inside that need to be released and that can be done via words ... easily we can purge it all out ... we just need to be careful where when who

fickle heart your fickle passions {if indeed passions you can harvest} arrest the loves and lustful sentiments that my contrived countenance denounces- and yet you, in fickle fashion, serve your reward {in distant solace my fantasy deceiving} chilled by the walls or earlier winters' desolations.

The hunger for love is much more difficult to remove than the hunger for  bread. ~Mother Teresa The body is in constant hunger ... Always in need for satisfaction, rest, action, water, food... Endless need... The heart hungers for one thing: love and the harmony it brings ... Lust, anger, pride, deceit, denial-- with these the heart withers, hardens... And its hunger never ends ... And the hunger for all other things increases, becomes insatiable...

desire fueled by loves fires the body ignites thirst and hunger for this and that of you and lips become more than flesh eyes bigger than oceans to lose myself in body a polarized force that pulls me and the intensity of your thought magnifies all longing and I'm helpless against it all

“The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.” ― Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

this is really to express my gratitude and also an apology. i apologize for having hurt you so deeply; and though it may have even felt planned and wantonly, it wasn't. i was caught up in my own cloud of hurt to have thought about how my words and actions were affecting you or anyone, even close friends who made comments and protests. i can see how gross and disturbing our last conversation was--and a number of others before that. In the past my regret was more based on how crazy i appeared than about how you felt. There was really no understanding of what was going on... i was just blindly acting out some crazy tragedy i my head. But a couple of days after we last spoke something fell on me--literally felt like a bucket of cold water had been thrown on me and i understood--i understood most of all how you felt and i understood you and everything came full circle; and i understood you and your actions and my actions; and i understood my behavior; and i can't fathom reason or ju...

bits and pieces of a poem I girl wrote to her partner in one of my poetry classes... it made such an impact I remembered it all for a while ... now it;s just bits and pieces ... and probably inaccurate... I always imagined her lovely boyish body leaning against that of her lover's as she wrote this. poetry speaks for silences words that, through shyness or fear, remain unspoken. there are no silences here ... my poetry to you laughs inside the walls ... you do not always recognize it (my poetry to you) so familiar to your sleep, that it no longer disturbs your dreams.

it was just the silence, the silence humming in my brain the words felt like rain when you look at raindrops falling and all i could feel was something like a windy tunnel where there was no wind and the temperature changed to some sort of cold heat and I could not speak and I could not flee.

Now this is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning. : Winston Churchill What we call the beginning is often the end. And to make an end is to make a beginning. The end is where we start from. : T. S. Eliot If you want a happy ending, that depends, of course, on where you stop your story. : Orson Welles

Hi G***. Today's card roars in with a creative force, Divine purpose, and pure ecstatic fervor! The Ace of Wands is the essences Goddess Shakti in all her splendor! This card represents creation, beginning, fortune, and adventure. Your wildest dreams manifesting, the seeds are planted, taking root, and growing, growing, growing! The Hindu Goddess Shakti is responsible for creation, she is the embodiment of the primordial cosmic energy, She is the influx for change. She brings to you now along with the Ace of Wands, your highest Self in your purest form. She reminds you that you, too, have this power within you and you need only focus your attention. Get excited and let the balls start a rolling! The Ace of Wands as depicted here in from artist Paul Edwards shows a Goddess of creation, with her hair of fire. Fire is the energy of creation. She holds in her hand her wand and with it she can do anything! She moves with the flow of the universe, and never worries about the outc...

Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen. : Winston Churchill Nonno's Poem How calmly does the olive branch Observe the sky begin to blanch Without a cry, without a prayer With no betrayal of despair Some time while light obscures the tree The zenith of its life will be Gone past forever And from thence A second history will commence A chronicle no longer gold A bargaining with mist and mold And finally the broken stem The plummeting to earth, and then And intercourse not well designed For beings of a golden kind Whose native green must arch above The earth's obscene corrupting love And still the ripe fruit and the branch Observe the sky begin to blanch Without a cry, without a prayer With no betrayal of despair Oh courage! Could you not as well Select a second place to dwell Not only in that golden tree But in the frightened heart of me Night of the Iguana, by Tennessee Williams

Love is not just tolerance. It's not just distant appreciation. It's a warm sense of, 'I am enjoying the fact that you are you. :N. T. Wright The more one does and sees and feels, the more one is able to do, and the more genuine may be one's appreciation of fundamental things like home, and love, and understanding companionship. : Amelia Earhart We become wiser by adversity; prosperity destroys our appreciation of the right. :Lucius Annaeus Seneca  I had a connoisseur's... appreciation of fear.Peter Straub 

At times I write about things I can't write

" Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate." --Carl Jung “ Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind . ” --Romans 12:2 Whether we like to or not we only have three alternatives: yesterday, the present and tomorrow. --Nicanor Parra  The other one, Borges , is the one to whom things happen . --"Borges and I", Jorge Luis Borges my path was bound by mirros; the spell of the mirros blinding me; selfish my steps, selfish my passions, selfish my motives ... my eyes fixed on this or that shadow; insensitive to the screams of the pain of others, I let myself be guided by the old scars--blind me, blinded by the shadow of this or that memory ... a prisoner in the darker recesses of my imagination, I didn't see the gifts laid before me ... while feeding fallacious resentments, I allowed anger to nurture my darker passions. Yet I don't know at what mome...

As far as we can discern, the sole purpose of human existence is to kindle a light in the darkness of mere being. The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed. Knowing your own darkness is the best method for dealing with the darknesses of other people. There is no coming to consciousness without pain. A man who has not passed through the inferno of his passions has never overcome them. Where love rules, there is no will to power; and where power predominates, there love is lacking. The one is the shadow of the other.  Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.

"Nothing is ever static--life changes, and people change--and learn"

We are more often frightened than hurt; and we suffer more from imagination than from reality. : Lucius Annaeus Seneca I'm a romantic, and we romantics are more sensitive to the way people feel. We love more, and we hurt more. When we're hurt, we hurt for a long time. : Freddy Fender You want to fall in love with a shoe, go ahead. A shoe can't love you back, but, on the other hand, a shoe can't hurt you too deeply either. And there are so many nice-looking shoes. : Allan Sherman Our healing begins when we hurt after having realized the pain we have caused those we love. :

so there can be something gay about starbucks!! the kick of caffeine aside-- take the 8th and 16th chelsea starbucks location large display windows to look in and out of sitting by the windows, passersby will stand and fix their hair, makeup, check their teeth, their pecs, arms, etc and the boys will check out their own asses, or lack thereof, as they flash through the window reflections all while I sip my coffee, the momentary happiness of sugar and caffeine and the occasional eye-candy  muscle boys catwalk out of this or that gym bundles of testosterone and steroid supplements tightly wrapped in some fashionable red, blue, pink outfit purchased down the block's boutique-- the window affords them a captive audience (in and out, the muscle sipping coffee laptops, tablets, phablet, free wifi, connect charge, recharge the device--its juice's run out) and i, i just enjoy the furtive looks of some clean cut white gay boy who feels a guilty pleasure to be gawking ...

I don't want to go on being a root in the dark, insecure, stretched out, shivering with sleep, going on down, into the moist guts of the earth, taking in and thinking, eating every day. --Walking Around, Pablo Neruda doing nothing has almost become the thing to do i walk around, think about this or that, i allow myself to be almost tired of the mutations, pieces of me falling apart wrapped in the shades and shadows of the others i tire of observing the bodies, large, short, heavy the walking dead that accompany me hard to picture those bodies full of liquids as solid, malleable, finite in their eternity filled with lights and darkness happiness, sadness, joy, pain, anguish ... all compact in a dimension beyond reach I allow myself to be, it's true, because i no longer want it i don't want to play this or that role of the young or old man, a man, a homosexual, a partner, lover, friend , companion, worker i tire of representations, repetitions, the in...

I don't want to go on being a root in the dark, insecure, stretched out, shivering with sleep, going on down, into the moist guts of the earth, taking in and thinking, eating every day. --Walking Around, Pablo Neruda el ocio se ha convertido casi en mi anti-ocio camino, pienso, me dejo vivir, ya casi cansado de mutaciones, pedazos de mi ser se desmoronan en tinieblas ajenas me canso de observar los cuerpos largos, cortos, pesados cadaveres ambulantes que me acompañan difícil a veces pensar que en esos cuerpos llenos líquidos sólidos, maleables, finitos en su eternidad llevan por dentro luces, oscuridades alegría, tristeza, gozo, dolor y la angustia ... todo compacto en una dimensión inalcanzable me dejo vivir, es cierto, porque no quiero más no quiero hacer más el papel de esto o aquello de joven, viejo, hombre, homosexual, amante, amigo, compañero, trabajador me canso de las representaciones, de las repeticiones, del increíble tedio del reloj me canso ya de...

Again, you can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something - your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life. : Steve Jobs Sometimes being a friend means mastering the art of timing. There is a time for silence. A time to let go and allow people to hurl themselves into their own destiny. And a time to prepare to pick up the pieces when it's all over. : Octavia Butler As long as we are persistence in our pursuit of our deepest destiny, we will continue to grow. We cannot choose the day or time when we will fully bloom. It happens in its own time. : Denis Waitley

Our intentions may be very good, but, because the intelligence is limited, the action may turn out to be a mistake - a mistake, but not necessarily a sin, for sin comes out of a wrong intention. : E. Stanley Jones  intention creates our reality. : Wayne Dyer A gift consists not in what is done or given, but in the intention of the giver or doer : .Lucius Annaeus Seneca

The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place. : George Bernard Shaw  Words are only painted fire; a look is the fire itself. : Mark Twain

"I think that sometimes love gets in the way of itself - you know, love interrupts itself. We want things so much that we sabotage them. : Jack White "I have a tendency to sabotage relationships; I have a tendency to sabotage everything. Fear of success, fear of failure, fear of being afraid. Useless, good-for-nothing thoughts." : Michael Buble

Every time you don't follow your inner guidance, you feel a loss of energy, loss of power, a sense of spiritual deadness. : Shakti Gawain

Five of Cups ~ LossHi Gººº. The Five of Cups is about loss and how to cope with your feelings of sadness, sorrow and regret. Have you recently experienced a loss? Your loss could be great or small. Foreclosure of a loved property, divorce, losing a good friend... Simply put, things have not turned out as you had hoped. It can be painful and come as quite a shock when you lose someone or something. You may feel numb, shock, denial, anger, guilt, depressed, defeated... just to name a few. You have to feel everything that you are meant to feel. There really is no way around it, you just need to go through it.When we are hurting it can be very difficult to stop the flow of negative thoughts. Loss hurts and no matter how much we accept intellectually that we must go with the flow, if that flow separates us from what we love, our feelings say, ‘No!’. This is okay, its just part of the process. Try to question your negative thoughts: is this really true?What is interesting about the Five ...

It seems to me that the real clue to your sex-orientation lies in your romantic feelings rather than in your sexual feelings. If you are really gay, you are able to fall in love with a man, not just enjoy having sex with him.  Christopher Isherwoo

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret. : Ambrose Bierce No work or love will flourish out of guilt, fear, or hollowness of heart, just as no valid plans for the future can be made by those who have no capacity for living now. : Alan Watts

The Devil Hi G***. In today's card we find our Self looking deep within. The Devil is a card of feeling bounded, limitations, and checking in to see what fear and doubt may be standing in your way. The Devil can be a much misrepresented card in the tarot; however, it is a card of self-realization in its deepest sense. Looking in the mirror, often times we do not recognize the person looking back. Some of us may even be in a space of avoiding the mirror all together. This is a time when we are faced with choices, and as always that feeling of separation and doubt comes to surface. The Devil reminds us that we do, in fact, have a choice. Looking deep into this rendition of the card, we see a faceless image in the mirror. Who are you truly? How do you wish to align your Self? We have been taught ways to cover or numb our feelings of fear, the darkness that exist within us. We have come to think that the darkness is a bad thing, however, without the dark there can be n...

“There are only patterns, patterns on top of patterns, patterns that affect other patterns. Patterns hidden by patterns. Patterns within patterns. If you watch close, history does nothing but repeat itself. What we call chaos is just patterns we haven't recognized. What we call random is just patterns we can't decipher. what we can't understand we call nonsense. What we can't read we call gibberish. There is no free will. There are no variables.” ― Chuck Palahniuk , Survivor

so yeah, sometimes there is this little nagging voice {Spanish "little" -- often used as hyperbole} so this little voice just keeps nagging me with its "yes yes yes" and, well, add to that the voice of the body--not to mention the heart but reason and logic kick in and say, "look at the evidence before you" and the fantasy fades ... some understanding has been gained--or maybe just a perspective and ultimately, it is my happiness I have to seek some observations have been made by less than casual observers and I think, "yeah, fuck it, why not!!??" but it's hard to ignore and let go of evidence and experience and words spoken

Breaking Free – Rising From The Ashes Hi G***. The “Eight of Swords” is numerated eight and represents regeneration and transition. The sky is cloudy, which represents something unclear. There is an archetype, dressed in white with their hands over their head and feels restricted because of the thoughts in their mind. The situation makes me feel like there is a struggle going on between their emotions (the 3 creatures dressed in black with static yellow hair) and their ego (the creature that is wearing a sun crown, with pointed spikes). The Moon represents (your emotions and fears) that are in opposition with your Sun (your ego and personal identity). There are eight Swords in front of the archetype dressed in white and they are symbolic of restriction and impaired clarity of vision. The “Eight of Swords” represents bondage of one’s thoughts imposed or caused by outside sources that are in opposition with your personal power sector (how you initiate what you want to do, and act on it)....

Seven of Cups ~ Imagination Hi G***o. Imagination is the beginning of creation. You imagine what you desire; you will what you imagine; and at last you create what you will. Your card today is the Seven of Cups. This card represents the imagination, wishes and infinite possibilities. It speaks of the many hopes, fears, thoughts, wishes, worries, and desires in your heart and soul. When you see this card, it means you need to figure out what is real and what is not. What is true and what is just an illusion, or even delusion? We are all surrounded by so much infinite possibility in our universe that it would probably be impossible to take it all in. Our minds naturally filter all the information so we can live without feeling overwhelmed. This filter works so that what we pick up is only what harmonises with our deepest beliefs, our sense of self, our values and our memory. This means that we tend not to see what doesn’t fit or match our internal map of the world. ...

Hi G. Today's card offers us balance, hope, and prosperity. The six of pentacles is a card of harmony, within our Self and with our environment. Maybe we have been feeling like things are not as they should be, but when this card appears, we are reminded of whom we truly are and what it is we truly seek. Our dreams are on path to actuality and we co-exist with those around us. We see how we are meant to give and how we are meant to receive. It is in this delicious dance that we move into the flow of life and find all we need within. The six of pentacles speaks of fulfillment in our career, family and love life. We truly are in balance with it all. And even though it may have felt as if we have taken a step back, the six of pentacles reminds us that we are moving in a spiral, up, and with purpose. This card requires us to find rhythm and take time daily to connect to our inner Self. It is through this connection we find all the answers we seek. It is through the stillness; we see ...

XVI Translated by Charles W. Johnson This poem is a paraphrase of the 30th poem of The Gardiner by Rabindranath Tagore. In my twilight sky, you are like a cloud And your shape and your color are just as I love them. Oh sweet-lipped woman, you are mine, you are mine, and my endless dreams live on in your life. The lamp of my soul casts a blush on your feet, My sour wine tastes sweeter on your lips: Oh harvester of my evening song, How my solitary dreams believe that you are mine! You are mine, you are mine, I go shouting to the evening breeze, and the wind sweeps away my widowed voice. You plunder the depths of my eyes, and they stem your night-time glance as if it were water. You are caught in the net of my music, my love, And the nets of my music are as wide as heaven. My soul is born on the shore of your mournful eyes. In your mournful eyes begins the land of dreams.

At fifteen life had taught me undeniably that surrender, in its place, was as honorable as resistance, especially if one had no choice. Maya Angelou from a place of weakness some are able to rise to a place of strength, especially after experiencing traumatic events; others, however, remain stuck in place replaying the dynamics of their trauma in unfulfilling relationships in an effort to take ownership of the pain and perhaps eventually master it--by eroticizing their trauma they now feel in control of it and thus feel they have overcome it-- they are in fact keeping the pain of their trauma alive and well ... This is a destructive approach and sinks those individuals into deeper and deeper dissatisfaction with their life, deep depression and great unhappiness ... And never quite able to understand why a life full of promise is failing

The Queen of Pentacles ~ Nurturing the Soul Hi G***. Your card today is the Queen of Pentacles. Queens, like other court cards, can be taken as actual people or they can represent inner parts of your personality. The Queen of Pentacles symbolizes nurturing, prosperity and fertility. If she is a person in your life, this Queen is usually a woman born under an Earth sign such as Taurus, Virgo, or Capricorn and you will likely recognise her as a wife, mother or a supportive, sensible, down to earth lady. Her home is always full with children, pets, plants, family and friends. This Queen is both a wonderful parent and has a good head for business and budgeting. She can multi-task like a pro. She will make a lovely home and she knows how to nurture a family with healthy home-cooked meals and all the domestic delights. When you feel down or unwell, the Queen of Pentacles will make you feel much better. She is hearth, home, motherhood and a kind and generous soul. As a result of her c...

For one human being to love another; that is perhaps the most difficult of all our tasks, the ultimate, the last test and proof, the work for which all other work is but preparation. Rainer Maria Rilke

"Life is Change. Change is optional. Choose Wisely." ~~ Karen Kaiser-Clark Madonna: [ strumming her guitar off-key ] It's really important to get out of your "comfort zone". I've made a lot of progress. so, yeah, it is true that there are times [too often] that we cheat ourselves, we deprive ourselves, of the things that we want need love desire ... we alienate or push away the people that we want [love desire] in our lives out of fear, misplaced distrust, and those, oh, so fun childhood patterns that we're so used to riding ... and I keep thinking about that Madonna quote [see above] ... that comfort zone that is so, well, not so  comfortable or even safe, but just easy ... it's easy to sit in your comfort zone and live an adequate life ... not terribly sad or terribly miserable, but not terribly happy or fulfilled or satisfied but just coasting along ... and ignoring our heart because, well, it's easier than taking a risk ... and replaying ...

Humans have a knack for choosing precisely the things that are worst for them. : J. K. Rowling

where the Void ends begins the You in the smoke of dreams the faces float flowing voices leave their echo mid-stream-- the past reflected against the mist the moment now is a lesson learned a mirror broken by Design the Cycle ended, the Letter writ the flow of time that breaks.

Once the realization is accepted that even between the closest human beings infinite distances continue, a wonderful living side by side can grow, if they succeed in loving the distance between them which makes it possible for each to see the other whole against the sky. : Rainer Maria Rilke

sometimes i want to write (read speak) about this thing that burns deep deep scorching the inner most core searing my being crackling into the air these words sometimes is more than a feeling and i want to run and name the fire it burns so my tongue lips chest my hardest sex in heated glow a scalding fire that shoots its waves across the air to me, from me a fire is this that can't quench, embers sparkling in my heart these words of smoke that chokes

You're NEVER stuck with your "so called" Reality. DO It Differently, and TRUST the COOL STUFF that CREATED you in the first place has your back. EVERYTHING is perfect, and YOUR JOB is to CONNECT to Source and ALIGN with it... Then LISTEN, Take Inspired Action, and ALLOW the AWESOMENESS to unfold. -- Scott Brandon Hoffman

First comes thought; then organization of that thought, into ideas and plans; then transformation of those plans into reality. The beginning, as you will observe, is in your imagination. : Napoleon Hill When we quit thinking primarily about ourselves and our own self-preservation, we undergo a truly heroic transformation of consciousness. : Joseph Campbell It is all very well to copy what one sees, but it is far better to draw what one now only sees in one's memory. That is a transformation in which imagination collaborates with memory. : Edgar Degas Transformation literally means going beyond your form. : Wayne Dyer

Battles Cry Out To Be Won Hi G***. This card is connected to the zodiac fire signs of Aries, Leo and Sagittarius which represents action and determination and courage. The sky is deep blue with massive storm clouds hovering in the distance and represents a difficult challenge. The storm clouds represent that emotions are on edge. The Nine of Wands represents the “Boat Cards” in my deck. The boat stands for something that you really want, and nobody can dissuade you, and with the “Nine of Wands” it signifies sailing your boat to the lit torches which represents the timing and the end of the challenging situation. A difficult challenge happens out of nowhere, just when you thought everything was going well, “Bang!” A new setback is draining you, and now you have another battle to fight! You will get through this struggle no matter how the situation pulls on you! You have the “Eyes of The Tiger” and will succeed! The Nine of Wands represents that you feel drai...