what the fuck is this about ...
what is this feeling really? some sort of chemical reaction ... just blurs all reason and logic. the brain keeps releasing this or that hormone or chemical ... I don't really know what it's called and too lazy now to look it up ... anyways, it just keeps releasing it and we feel something--like a longing mixed with desire and deep affection .... and the heart races and the cock gets hard and the brain creates all these beautiful fantasies ... pornographic and sometimes heroic ... like sometimes there is this fantasy that I bump into this guy and I talk to/seduce him and push him against some wall somewhere in the west village and french kiss him ... fantasies that take a life of their own and I have to shut them off ... because they have a tendency to happen at the most inconvenient times ... or I'm standing somewhere innocently going about my business and he pops into my head and I get a fucking mean hard-on and it's like what the fuck!! jeez
but I digress ... what the hell is this feeling all about ... and feeling some bizarre mind meld thing going on--like I can sense his feelings an desires ... or feeling sometime his almost physical presence--this one is freaky!!
and I ask myself if I'm going crazy or just terribly lonely or I don't know what ... I just can't understand it ... I figure you sever ties and it all ends and you go about your business ... that whole irreconcilable differences metaphor ... but no, there seems to be some other fucking force at work ... some energy that I can't control or diffuse no matter how hard I try ... and it seems to punish me by growing more the harder I try to diffuse it ... but really, I ask myself what the fuck is this about?
but I digress ... what the hell is this feeling all about ... and feeling some bizarre mind meld thing going on--like I can sense his feelings an desires ... or feeling sometime his almost physical presence--this one is freaky!!
and I ask myself if I'm going crazy or just terribly lonely or I don't know what ... I just can't understand it ... I figure you sever ties and it all ends and you go about your business ... that whole irreconcilable differences metaphor ... but no, there seems to be some other fucking force at work ... some energy that I can't control or diffuse no matter how hard I try ... and it seems to punish me by growing more the harder I try to diffuse it ... but really, I ask myself what the fuck is this about?