why do i

why do i, time be damned
why do i
{the words that the fingers fear}
the words that make me feel foolish--
why do i
despite the past that rings
in stagnant streams of lost time
why do i
not the fear of being
"the me inside my head"
why do i think about you
and want to have the power to see beyond
the calendars that have marked our faces
who do i
because then with you present
i did not feel lonely or wandering out aimlessly
and it took the fallout of a cursed moment
to have understood it.

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