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Time moves in one direction, memory in another. :  William Gibson Hide nothing, for time, which sees all and hears all, exposes all. : Sophocles So during those first moments of the day, which are yours and yours alone, you can circumvent these boundaries and concentrate fully on spiritual matters. And this gives you the opportunity to plan the time management of the entire day. : Menachem Mendel Schneerson Let him who would enjoy a good future waste none of his present. : Roger Babson

“The Light is more than some abstract, unknowable energy force. Light is Truth. If Light is truth, then darkness must be lies. Each and every lie we tell to ourselves and others casts the shadow of separation upon us. Every time even the most minor deception is revealed and the truth is made known we are re-united with the Light. So, Let there be Light. Those are the words by which you can create your own magnificent world.” ~ Renee Bledsoe, Addiction Alchemy Some people will not tolerate such emotional honesty in communication. They would rather defend their dishonesty on the grounds that it might hurt others. Therefore, having rationalized their phoniness into nobility, they settle for superficial relationships. ~ unknown author We tell lies when we are afraid….afraid of what we don’t know, afraid of what others will think, afraid of what will be found out about us. But every time we tell a lie, the thing that we fear grows stronger. ~ Tad Williams The Truth is more impor...

the wind changes its course the ocean redirects its currents clouds, at the wind's whims, hide and reveal the stars that in the distance reveal their fire yet the echoes of an illusion remain constant, the sound reverberates.

Freeing yourself was one thing; claiming ownership of that freed self was another.  : Toni Morrison so i have been thinking lately, and just like the Talking Heads song says, "how did i get here?" For a long time i did what "felt right"; i'd just let my gut feeling guide me and let it take me in whatever direction--nothing to lose and whatever was to be gained would be waiting; and that got me far--deep into my mid 30s. And then one day things stopped feeling right; work was no longer satisfying; my personal life was lacking many of the elements that would make one happy; i realized that the so-called relationship i had been in for years didnt provide the elements that a relationship was supposed to provide; the support, the affection, the sense of "family" was lacking from it--there was familiarity and there was companionship and sexual intimacy, but other more fulfilling elements were missing; and I found myself lonely even in the company of this ...

You cannot escape the responsibility of tomorrow by evading it today. : Abraham Lincoln One's philosophy is not best expressed in words; it is expressed in the choices one makes... and the choices we make are ultimately our responsibility. : Eleanor Roosevelt If you take responsibility for yourself you will develop a hunger to accomplish your dreams. : Les Brown Most people do not really want freedom, because freedom involves responsibility, and most people are frightened of responsibility. : Sigmund Freud

cambia la brisa sus destinos, el mar redirige sus corrientes las nubes a merced de los vientos nos ocultan y revelan los astros que en la distancia deparan sus lumbres mas aún reverberan los ecos y crecen las raíces de una ilusión.

changes felt and projected some are not changes but just "me as I used to be" or me as I am ... take your pick more casual and less {whatever that was that I was projecting} shedding off a lot of old skin and dropping the mask and the road now seems unclear, incomplete feels like a road I can work with and I like the body that I'm in as it is, changes and all as has changed the bodies that I like, want, desire and I am certain that my feelings have changed too more intense in a good way and my "vision" has cleared in some ways (so watch out) and {I do have to chuckle here} I know what I want and also who I mean I really know--it's not a fantasy or just a fleeting desire and letting go of so much has been a hard, hard process--as is acceptance but tangibles can't always provide the final verdict and changes have happened, they have in the way I see my life ... all my secret fears that I have tucked away I've taken the time to inven...

"No one has ever been angry at another human being. We’re only angry at our story of them. "

 "When we’re true to ourselves, we become instruments of truth for the planet. Because we’re all connected, we touch the lives of everyone around us, who then affect others. Our only obligation is to be the love we are and allow our answers to come from within in the way that’s most appropriate for us. Finally, I can’t stress enough how important it is to enjoy yourself and not take yourself or life too seriously. One of the biggest flaws with many traditional spiritual systems is that they give you such a somber outlook. Although you know that I abhor creating doctrines, if I ever had to create a set of tenets for a spiritual path to healing, number one on my list would be to make sure to laugh as often as possible throughout every single day—and preferably laugh at myself. This would be hands down over and above any form of prayer, meditation, chanting, or diet reform. Day-to-day problems never seem as big when viewed through a veil of humor and love. In this age of inform...

The Two of Pentacles Hi G***. The Two of Pentacles brings to us many reminders! This is a card of many things happening at once, of finding balance and peace within the chaos, and of remembrance of your true nature; one of abundance, joyful, and existing in the present. The Two of Pentacles is a card of taking life's many opportunities and obstacles in stride. This card speaks to being focused on your intent, and staying grounded in the moment. Many times life's chaos distracts us, and we start looking to the future, and what we want to create, forgetting that in order to manifest we must truly be rooted in the present. Financial worries, and the how it will all happen cloud our connection to Self and Source. The energy of the Two of Pentacles comes to you know to remind you there is no need to worry. You have all you need within to progress in the direction you seek. This card reminds you to stay centered, focus, and mindful, and to remember that life is meant ...

The art of love is largely the art of persistence.  : Albert Ellis

Some people are afraid of what they might find if they try to analyze themselves too much, but you have to crawl into your wounds to discover where your fears are. Once the bleeding starts, the cleansing can begin. : Tori Amos Man learns through experience, and the spiritual path is full of different kinds of experiences. He will encounter many difficulties and obstacles, and they are the very experiences he needs to encourage and complete the cleansing process. : Sai Baba However it is debased or misinterpreted, love is a redemptive feature. To focus on one individual so that their desires become superior to yours is a very cleansing experience. : Jeanette Winterson

start, re-start, pedal the clutch forward, park reverse  neutral first, second, third shift gears stop go accelerate

All the art of living lies in a fine mingling of letting go and holding on. : Havelock Ellis Some of us think holding on makes us strong; but sometimes it is letting go. : Hermann Hesse Nothing in the universe can stop you from letting go and starting over. : Guy Finley Forgiveness means letting go of the past. : Gerald Jampolsky Inner peace can be reached only when we practice forgiveness. Forgiveness is letting go of the past, and is therefore the means for correcting our mis-perceptions. : Gerald Jampolsky Abundance is a process of letting go; that which is empty can receive. : Bryant McGill Sometimes we can get all caught up in situations that are really not ours to  resolve. Each one of us is master if his or her domain and as such will seek what is best for us, what will bring us happiness and fulfillment, what will drive us to get up in the mornings and see our life with approval and satisfaction; and we equally seek to sorround ourselves with people who ...

it's fascinating to watch some people who are in relationships that are unhappy at best and destructive at worse ... yet perfectly intelligent people hang on to these relationships and the abuse associated with them as if they had no choice ... is it inexplicable? not really ... these people have become addicted to the relationship and the emotional or physical abuse that comes with it ... so much so that they often get sexually aroused at the thought of the abuse ... In my ignorance, I always thought this was purely the case for women who got involved in relationships with abusive and manipulative men who seek out women with low self esteem and then proceed to keep them under their domination.  I was surprised to find that many men, in this case, gay men, fall under this same paradigm. Intelligent, good looking men with low self esteem who get into relationships with other guys who know how to push the buttons of their low self esteem and keep them under their control and abuse....

"The chains of habit are generally too small to be felt until they are too strong to be broken." : Samuel Johnson "Once addiction takes place, the patient has no choice but to continue to use. Physiological and neurological changes take place in the brain. You can actually see the changes that have taken place in the brain." : Marc Kleinman "The inability to stop is the essence of what addiction is, ... my favorite drug was more and all." : Nora Volkow "How use doth breed a habit in a man!" : William Shakespeare She goes from one addiction to another. All are ways for her to not feel her feelings. : Ellen Burstyn "Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesn't mean the circus has left town." : George Carlin "I know I struggled with it during my high school/adolescent stage. It was an addiction that I fought with every day. I was trying to conquer my sexual desires through something the world says is acce...

Man is the only animal that can remain on friendly terms with the victims he intends to eat until he eats them. : Samuel Butler {and if I may add to this, "man is the only animal that will remain with its predator until it is eaten."} Victims always feel alone and helpless. : Deepak Chopra I see people in my life who have places themselves in the position of the victim. They suffer from emotional manipulation and abuse, financial manipulation and even physical abuse, and yet they remain attached to those that are using them--unhappy and dissatisfied as they may be--as long as they get the crumbs of attention thrown their way, quite often in the form or sexual domination ... something that may look and feel like love but that is nothing more than the rope that ties them to their unhappiness. And these poor saps defend their tormentor and some even grow to love them; they become comfortable in their position as victim and abdicate the dominion of their happiness and fulf...

Card 1 (The Sun) : How you feel about yourself now   » You are feeling abundant happy and joyful - if you don't, be assured that you are about to enter a period of success and fulfillment. This is a time of pleasure, vitality and good health, travel and holidays to be enjoyed. Good news around children or the conception or birth of a longed-for baby. The Sun heralds an ending to difficulties and a time to celebrate with friends and loved ones. Card 2 (Judgement) : What you most want at this moment   » The cards suggest that what you most want at this time is a new start, to close this chapter in your life and have a brand new beginning. This is not a time for regret but for rejoicing. Rewards for past efforts will follow and you are sure to have many opportunities presented to you. Life will pick up a pace and the choices you make will have far reaching implications that could change your life dramatic...

Our character is basically a composite of our habits. Because they are consistent, often unconcious patterns, they constantly, daily, express our character. : Stephen Covey In short, no pattern is an isolated entity. Each pattern can exist in the world only to the extent that is supported by other patterns: the larger patterns in which it is embedded, the patterns of the same size that surround it, and the smaller patterns which are embedded in it. : Christopher Alexander it's not hard to figure people out, really; all we have to do is pay close attention to theirs patters. How they behave in the face of this or that situation, how they behave in the presence or absence of this or that person, object or situation, their speech, their mood, even the words that are chosen give away the truth or its absence ... Once we have some of those patterns figured out, we gain a deeper understanding of those around us, their joys and sadness

It is the false shame of fools to try to conceal wounds that have not healed. : Horace The voice of the intelligence is drowned out by the roar of fear. It is ignored by the voice of desire. It is contradicted by the voice of shame. It is biased by hate and extinguished by anger. Most of all it is silenced by ignorance {of self}. : Karl A. Menninger At best the family teaches the finest things human beings can learn from one another generosity and love. But it is also, all too often, where we learn nasty things like hate, rage and shame. : Barbara Ehrenreich

The Bully Card Hi G***. The “Five of Swords” is connected to the zodiac signs of Gemini, Libra and Aquarius. You may feel over-stimulated today, and your tongue has a stinging effect! You are not sugar-coating your thoughts! You will call a spade a spade, and you are not afraid to voice your opinion! You are not going to be challenged by other people today! The “Five of Swords” is about overstepping your boundaries when something has gone wrong with your friends or the people around you. You may have pushed too hard and now you feel ashamed because of your erratic attempts to control the situation. You will come to realize the damage has is done. Your bragging ended up alienating yourself from your friends and the people around you, who are shunning the kind of person that you have become. You may have lost your friends’ respect, and even if you apologize, they may never trust you again. You have won the battle, but lost the war and isolated yourself. The vi...

"I have learned this at least by my experiment: that if one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, one passes an invisible boundary ... all sort of things begin to occur that never otherwise would have occurred. One begins to meet with a success unexpected in common hours. New, more universal, more liberal laws begin to establish themselves around this person, or the old laws are rearranged in one's favor, nevertheless, one begins to live with the license of a higher order of being." : Henry David Thoreau

Your "Superior" or "True Self" is perfect. It is so now and it has always been. It cannot age, it cannot sicken, it cannot suffer, it cannot fear and it cannot die because it is pure LIFE. It is love, joy, beauty, harmony; it is TRUTH; it is your truth, my truth, the truth of all humanity. Just like a drop of water us not the sea but contains all the same elements, so does every human being contain all the divine elements of the Supreme. ... Anything manifesting in your life contrary to this truth, contrary to Divine Harmony, is due to an erroneous belief that has been deeply ingrained in us; it is a negative reflection that you're projecting outward and which is attracting similar negative energy from your environment. It has nothing to do with your True Self. Your True Self remains perfect. .... Whenever faced by negative energy and circumstances, first and foremost you must remember that your True Self is perfect; secondly, you must declare that you do no...

“The worst lies are the lies we tell ourselves. We live in denial of what we do, even what we think. We do this because we're afraid. We fear we will not find love, and when we find it we fear we'll lose it. We fear that if we do not have love we will be unhappy.” : Richard Bach

“A soulmate is someone who has locks that fit our keys, and keys to fit our locks. When we feel safe enough to open the locks, our truest selves step out and we can be completely and honestly who we are; we can be loved for who we are and not for who we’re pretending to be. Each unveils the best part of the other. No matter what else goes wrong around us, with that one person we’re safe in our own paradise. Our soulmate is someone who shares our deepest longings, our sense of direction. When we’re two balloons, and together our direction is up, chances are we’ve found the right person. Our soulmate is the one who makes life come to life.” : Richard Bach It's a great relationship when you can work with the person who you consider to be your soul mate. : Rick Derringer Deep in my heart I know my future soul mate is not waiting for me online. : Liz Tuccillo

words compliment the architecture of the heart. the contours of our feelings create reflections against our thoughts images stream and bifurcate, letters flow, emotions light and shade the spirit all mandated by the lines, angles, surfaces, planes drawn on the master blueprint ... 

I was browsing the net and came across this quote by someone named Bernard Meltzer: "When you forgive, you in no way change the past - but you sure do change the future." It talked to me ... I am feeling like I need to forgive myself and also forgive a couple of people around me ... and not just forgive them, but also leave them behind -- they have to become the past -- I have tried unsuccessfully before, but given where my life is now, I think a complete cleansing is needed. Detach myself from people whose negative energy and lack of honesty generate toxicity. Funny because some people try to do the right thing--but that is the key here, they "try" -- the right thing is done because it's part of how we function in life and see the world and not because we want to be good people and have others like us or see the good we do ... this is where honesty comes into play ... we need to be honest with ourselves and be ourselves instead of "trying" to be ...

Honesty is the first chapter in the book of wisdom. : Thomas Jefferson Honesty does not always bring a response of love, but it is absolutely essential to it. : Ray Blanton Honesty will never break you. : Kate Hudson funny all about honesty ... I find that most people fail at it, and mostly because they are not honest with themselves. They end-up playing games with people around them and then are surprised when people fuck them over or move away from them -- they do not realize that they are not honest and that people can see right through them ... of course, those games are also the hallmark of the arrogant and the immature--those who think they are so clever that others do not see right through their little games; and it is not that people don't see right through them, it's that we choose not to call them out on their games--why bother? the immature resort to denial, the arrogant to fallacious arguments.  

It's easier to say fuck it and just let things go than to make the effort Easier to just take the easy way out-- thus the easy way out Than to fight for something or even make the attempt to conquer someone Why bother really, what's the point? It all ends, anyway What's this all about -- working and feeling and going through this or that And then there are the people around us who are all afraid of life and are all needy and inconsistent And are they even worth the effort in the end? I mean, I'm really asking the question Why is it that the heart wants companionship and it has to be this one and not someone else Or better yet, no one I don't give a shit really or I don't want to give a shit There has to be some way to just block feelings Meditation, or some other mental exercise I can't be bothered any more, I don't want to be bothered I don't want to lose one more minute of my life on this Just when I think it's done ... I don...

how do i,do i how do i reach the me that is where? on the path to what you? where is there a me that is and is also you? where is the you that i knew hidden where, waiting behind the another.

so yeah, I have been feeling a little lonely and perhaps even horny. A guy I like is, well, just a friend and not interested in me anyway and attached to his ex's cock ... so there is an ex that has been circling me and wants to re-engage; and I was foolishly considering it--after all, I have nothing going on in my romantic life right now. But then, I see this guy I just mentioned and his relationship with his ex: unhealthy, dissatisfying and possibly even abusive... not friends and not lovers ... and I have been talking to a new-found friend who is going through a fairly ugly break-up with an ex with whom he had broken up and returned to several times. He now regrets those decisions deeply and is asking himself why he kept doing it, why did he keep returning; he now even questions why he was EVER with the guy to begin with; the fact is that he learned whatever he was supposed to learn and can now move on -- but before moving on, he has to heal the deep wounds that relationship has...

how do you reconcile the fact that you have an intimate sexual relationship with someone, the fact that you do not have an emotional bond but have expectations that go beyond friendship? I imagine resentment will be deeply imbued in that arrangement ... feelings of anger will emerge as a result of feeling used, of having to perform a role that is not emotionally fulfilling but that should be ... of feeling locked into a deal that will in the end yield no results other than the occasional sexual gratification ... I imagine people locked in such an arrangement are prone to subtle hostility and perhaps even outright physical aggression. Worse yet, what happens if feelings develop that go ignored, unrequited? How do you deal with emotional needs that go unmet or half met? How do you deal with the fact that, after all is said and done, you were nothing more than a piece of meat that someone else used to satisfy their sexual desires? That your reward is a quasi friendship and some empty p...

Loving can cost a lot but not loving always costs more, and those who fear to love often find that want of love is an emptiness that robs the joy from life. : Merle Shain Our greatest pretenses are built up not to hide the evil and the ugly in us, but our emptiness. The hardest thing to hide is something that is not there. : Eric Hoffer

Sex is like washing your face - just something you do because you have to. Sex without love is absolutely ridiculous. Sex follows love, it never precedes it. : Sophia Loren if I may take the liberty to interpret, I think she means that sex is an act we perform that does not have to be attached to an emotion--it's purely a physical need. Engaging in sex as a precursor to falling in love or developing a deep emotional bond, however, that would be ridiculous; you fall in love with someone and sexual desire follows ... not the the other way around.

There can be no deep disappointment where there is not deep love. : Martin Luther King, Jr Disenchantment, whether it is a minor disappointment or a major shock, is the signal that things are moving into transition in our lives. : William Throsby Bridges

there are days when i--days when i think about you thoughts more feelings than words the longing for you to be near i could say there is a longing and days can be long sometimes and i know what my heart wants is there are days when i--days when i think about your senses more the desire is than wanting to hear you and it's more to touch and be more than it's the desire to feel you more than i see and what your flesh tastes like there are days when i--days when i think about your body more than any word can is how my flesh burns and it is hard to think about you otherwise

I'm so fascinated by the human longing for meaning. The way we relate romantically to each other is so much to do with our longing for meaning as well. : Kimbra Is there anything better than to be longing for something, when you know it is within reach? : Greta Garbo Happiness is the longing for repetition. : Milan Kundera

there are many, many days--too many where i weave myself this shroud with words that haunt too many pasts to be considered, too many hours spent too many manys to be counted or revisited and there are these days where the manys weigh more than way, way way more than the air that fills my lungs to live more more than the words that fill my sentient brain the letters, spaces, utterances that repeat there's this or that vision to be reached wordless thoughts that fill the senses blind the electric shocking fuzz that wakes me electrified the many manys longed for that words fail to understand and just like now my heart is beating fast the many manys flowing full blast

i think love is like one of those recurring infections -- like some sort of resistant bacteria you apply antibiotics and all sort of antibacterial ointments and it goes away for a little while but before you know, boom! the infection is back and you can get some relief from it by fucking, but that's like taking painkillers when you're suffering from a bad hernia-- you know the pain is coming back with a vengeance

Blake said that the body was the soul's prison unless the five senses are fully developed and open. He considered the senses the 'windows of the soul.' When sex involves all the senses intensely, it can be like a mystical experence. : Jim Morrison Sex without love is absolutely ridiculous. Sex follows love, it never precedes it. : Sophia Loren For flavor, instant sex will never supersede the stuff you have to peel and cook. : Quentin Crisp

Hi G***. It’s often said that the Eight of Pentacles just means work, but it means so much more. It means finding work that is your bliss. Let me let you in on a secret: you are here with a special calling and you have great work to do in this life. There is a good reason why you are here and deep down you do know what you want to do with your life. You’re gifted and those gifts are on purpose. I used to believe that it was impossible to love your work, and except for a lucky few, most of us were destined to suffer. I believed that work wasn’t meant to be fun, so I stayed in a job I hated. After all, I thought, why would you get paid for doing something enjoyable? So what if I told you that it doesn’t have to be this way? I found my bliss and not a day goes by when I don’t wake feeling immensely grateful and excited about another day. You can too. The work you love is waiting for you. And here is the best news: you will likely find your soul mate when you are on your...

"Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions." : Dalai Lama Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony. : Mahatma Gandhi There is only one happiness in this life, to love and be loved. : George Sand

have you ever been connected to an other where you feel how he feels, feel his sadness and his joy? feel his wants and desires? sense his voice, his presence, when he wakes? is that just crazy talk? Probably the first signs of insanity ... 

desires casting dreams hopes projecting journeys distances driving hearts hearts casting connections fate bending wills.

Nobody ever did, or ever will, escape the consequences of his choices. : Alfred A. Montapert

Hi G***. The classic vacation card, needing to rest, the integration stage of issues that took a long battle. Truce. Through the process of integration, a problem has been brought to light on four levels of understanding. Clarity dawns on the mental, the emotional, the spiritual and the external worlds. Regeneration happens, starting from a deeply spiritual inner source reaching out to all four levels of our being. The four of swords turned up for me last week. I impulsively planned a short trip to Naples Italy. I always had wanted to go there, to see Pompeii, the secret museum ( the erotic art that had been locked until 1970) and to eat the fabulous pizza. Don't really know why al of sudden I jumped on a plane, even when boarding the plane I was wondering why it had to Naples of a sudden. I do trust my impulses, as they usually turn out to be a playful nudge from my soul. Besides, who would object to having four days of Art and Pizza? I decided to simply see wha...

sometimes i sit down to write ... wanting to write something very deep and meaningful and i touch the keys gently, the clickity-clack of the QWERTY ... what power these words do have ... they're infused with hope and some deeper meaning that often escapes me ... i can take a trip here with them, some sort of fantasy, and even a romance ... just by gently tapping on the keys ... and I wonder what ideas these words might create on the causal reader who happens to come across them -- by mere accident most likely ... and what they might think of he who wrote them ... just words on a white page, they will think, just words on a white page.