Thought on Hooking-up
"Sex without love is merely healthy exercise." ~ Robert A. Heinlein
so the FWB seems so popular that I have been considering it ... have some potentials who would be cool with it and are sexually appealing and compatible and fun and I know I would never get emotionally attached and I don't think they would either ... but I have been down this muddy road before--two recently lost friendships because I was not showing signs of emotional attraction!!! ... but still, I say to myself, in the absence of anything, this may be a good palliative for my horniness ...
but then I read stuff online (http://www.glamour.com/sex-love-life/blogs/smitten/2011/07/6-reasons-friends-with-benefit.html) and I'm like, humm, should I step into the murky waters? my last long term FWB ended up kicking me while walking down 6th ave ... not a good ending to the harmless fun we once had--and on top of that I wasted my 8 good dating years with a guy who was sexy and sexual, but not partner material for me ... it became awkward when I got interested in someone else or spoke about my casual trysts--there would be attitude and even subdued anger, followed by the "kool, have fun; hope it works ... " and my inevitable but short-lived guilt ...
so, I'm like, hmmm, decisions, decisions ... plus I am actively looking for someone to date seriously---dare I say looking for love, wanting it---- but in the mean time need to fuck regularly; and I'm not into the random hooking up thing ... cool to just have a regular fuck bud and cooler still if they can be a wing-man ... but then again, the heart is a funny fellow and I detest drama, and possessiveness, especially from guys I have no emotional attachment to ... arghhh!!
maybe I should just keep my fuck-buddy booty call buds and not muddy things by injecting more familiarity than is needed to any of my friendships ... what to do????
so the FWB seems so popular that I have been considering it ... have some potentials who would be cool with it and are sexually appealing and compatible and fun and I know I would never get emotionally attached and I don't think they would either ... but I have been down this muddy road before--two recently lost friendships because I was not showing signs of emotional attraction!!! ... but still, I say to myself, in the absence of anything, this may be a good palliative for my horniness ...
but then I read stuff online (http://www.glamour.com/sex-love-life/blogs/smitten/2011/07/6-reasons-friends-with-benefit.html) and I'm like, humm, should I step into the murky waters? my last long term FWB ended up kicking me while walking down 6th ave ... not a good ending to the harmless fun we once had--and on top of that I wasted my 8 good dating years with a guy who was sexy and sexual, but not partner material for me ... it became awkward when I got interested in someone else or spoke about my casual trysts--there would be attitude and even subdued anger, followed by the "kool, have fun; hope it works ... " and my inevitable but short-lived guilt ...
so, I'm like, hmmm, decisions, decisions ... plus I am actively looking for someone to date seriously---dare I say looking for love, wanting it---- but in the mean time need to fuck regularly; and I'm not into the random hooking up thing ... cool to just have a regular fuck bud and cooler still if they can be a wing-man ... but then again, the heart is a funny fellow and I detest drama, and possessiveness, especially from guys I have no emotional attachment to ... arghhh!!
maybe I should just keep my fuck-buddy booty call buds and not muddy things by injecting more familiarity than is needed to any of my friendships ... what to do????