Brand new

i can no longer walk the long corridors of the library
shooing away my loneliness by reading this or that poem
and even avidly looking at photographs and illustrations,
searching for the evidence that it isn't just me who is lonely
those days have ended
and that was a romantic loneliness, digestible
i might even call it inspirational

but this, this is another loneliness
it has dimension, weigh, color, smell
it fuses itself with the image in the mirror
it mixes in with ease in a smile or even the singing of a song

until now I hadn't noticed how i feed it
with gifts of letters, my dreams, my fantasies
everything, I give it everything so long as it stays with me

this is a band new type of loneliness--we hadn't met before
so new it still lacks description
but i recognize it when i look at my face, and even yours too.
with this new loneliness i wander around the city
a city that now feels even bigger.